perspective taking

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The Value in Perspective Taking

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Perspective taking is the ability to see things from another person’s view and to better understand what he or she is thinking and feeling. It also comprises of the ability to experience and convey empathy for the other person. It is a life skill that is essential in our social interactions. Perspective taking is related to the concept of Theory of Mind which is the awareness that others have different thoughts, emotions, reactions, intentions, perspectives and beliefs than we do.
The ability to listen and acknowledge another’s perspective will often support enriched relationships, successful careers, a calmer mood and a deeper tolerance of differences in others.  In our current times of social media, political agendas and advocating for oneself, we can easily get caught in the frenzy to express ourselves and overlook the ability to listen and consider another’s perspective. Politics and social culture aside, we can easily forget to stop and consider the perspective of those who are important to us.
When you are able to see things from another’s point of view you are better able to understand and interact with others. Considering another person’s perspective does not mean you need to agree with what they have done or said but you can understand where he or she is coming from. This will enable you to ease your natural defenses and cultivate understanding of alternate ways of thinking, feeling and behaving. A person who is able to step into another’s shoes is less likely to argue with others because the person is now able to make better sense of other people’s behavior. They are also able to broaden their thinking and consider other points of view.
The most beneficial outcome from perspective taking is improvement in our relationships with the people in our daily lives.

Spouses & Significant Others

As a couple develops a relationship they get to know one another very well. Each partner observes patterns of behavior, experience routines and comes to expect what their partner may say or do at any given time. This often leads to a habit of assuming what the other person is thinking or feeling and a decrease in perspective taking. Spouses who regularly consider the other person’s perspective often engage in fewer arguments, feel a greater respect for one another and remain inquisitive about each another, refraining from assumptions.

Children

Perspective taking can allow a parent to understand a child’s behavior and improve communication. Children can often feel misunderstood or as if their opinion does not matter. Imagine the feeling a child has when a parent takes the time to understand how she is feeling. Just as important, imagine how the parent feels when he or she can understand why their child is behaving a certain way and can help alter the pattern of behavior. Taking a moment to shift from enforcing rules to having a conversation and learning how to better support a child’s needs can lead to increased communication and better behavior. This does not mean supporting a child’s need to eat ice cream at ten o’clock at night, but may decrease the drawn out process of going to bed by creating a reminder system to put on pajamas ten minutes prior.

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